little heart

Miah transitioned well to her big girl bed, but with the transition came new phases. Her most recent phase is to insist that Mom stay to hug or be hugged by Miah until she falls asleep. Although this is cute--and oh so tempting when I am craving cuddle time--I don't want her to think she is in control, or depend on my presence to fall asleep. The dilemmas of parenthood! For a couple weeks now, we go from sweet hugs and kisses and sleepy eyes to heart-melting screams before she drops off to sleep.

The other night I leaned over for the last goodnight kiss, and she tightly gripped my head close to hers. I stood like that for a little while. If I even thought of moving, I would feel her tighten her grip, and then her breathing would grow soft. As she gripped me, my ear to her little chest, I could hear the quick little beat of her busy heart. It took me back.

The first time I knew she was real, was when I heard her heart beat. Sure I had gained weight, and watched the fetus in the books grow week by week, but she was still foreign to me until the doc let us listen to her. Thumpthumpthumpthumpthump. She sounded like a train, like her heart would give out before she was ever born, like she was busy growing. The doc said they all sound like this. I am still amazed that such a tiny life can have such a busy, beating heart.

Her heart! She is two, with all the difficulties of being two in a world with so much to experience, but her spirit of hospitality is precious. For the time being, she is occupied with identifying what belongs to whom: "Daddy's. Mommy's--no Daddy's--Mommy's! Doggy's." When she is wrong, things get heated; when she's right, she's adorable. Soon, everything will be "mine," but we don't tell her we know what's coming.

This afternoon, Dad needed to lie down. Before Miah got to playing, she brought him her pillow and blankey to make sure he was comfortable, and then respectfully played around him.

She's especially attentive to the dog, so I'm not sure when was the last time Roxy ate her dinner in peace. It's a good thing Roxy will eat around any distraction, like little hands making select piles of kibble for her. Also, now that the weather is nice, we've been playing more outside. Miah loves this because both neighbors have dogs. One is nice enough to let Miah give her kisses.